Why are you reading this? You should be dead!

Sure we all know that the air we breath filled with smog, the water we drink contaminated by pollution, my milk is pumped full of cancer causing steroids, and even the fruit and vegetables are laden with harmful pesticides that should have done me in by now...

But toxins take years to build up in the body; according to idiots like the "The National Playground Safety Institue" you probably should have died back in elementary school. Why? All the horribly unsafe playground equipment of course. Metal jungle gyms, high monkey bars, and other dangerous items like the Tornado slide have been replaced with safe, plastic garbage.

I loved the tornado slide. I slid down it, climbed up the wrong way... climbed the support beams and fell down a few times that's what being a kid is all about.

Frankly I'm not sure where these idiots get off... I played on the super dangerous playground equipment, you did too. And look, we're both alive to tell the tale (whew!)...Come to think of it, the folks that are causing all the old equipment to be replaced must have also used the same playground equipment and (except for some stupid ideas, I'm sure as a result of falling on their heads to much as children) are OK.

If you look on the Internet you'll see about 200,000 children go to the emergency room each year for playground related injuries and about 15 die every year.... yep 15 out of millions. I know it sounds cruel but perhaps those 15 were a little dee-dee-dee if you know what I mean. Look folks, sheltering your children from reality is not helping them.

To all the idiots that feel the playgrounds they themselves grew up with are to dangerous for kids I say look... you are obviously a misguided idiot, but not enough of an idiot to have died on the monkey bars" maybe you should have done everyone a favor and just let go of those bars.

Destroying my childhood playgrounds to make them "safer" not tomland approved.